I’ve had the “talk” more than twice already. And not that mainstream “talk” about how alcohol and cigarettes destroy your life. But the one that all overachievers have: the prioritizing talk, or more commonly, the “Learning how to say no” talk. The first time I had it was actually back in 6th grade, then again in 8th grade, and finally last semester, all which I ignored for some sort of inner rebellion and reassurance that I was on the “right track”. But reading “Put Things First”, the third chapter “7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens”, brought back that sour feeling I had about not knowing how to say “no” to different opportunities and spreading myself too thin with activities.
It started out back in 6th grade, with the Green Team, MUN, Techo, GIN and GO3 Club. As an 11 year old, I was freaking about the fact that I didn’t have a certain interest or talent, assuming that the rest of my friends had everything set clear. Although I was far from right, at that time I didn’t see so, which is why, from the fear of having nothing, I started trying out everything. And I made the mistake of thinking that the older I got, the more clubs I should be able to handle, which is why I started adding Robotics and NJHS to the mix, each year growing the number of things I did and not the skill within those activities. It was only because of the three teachers that came forward and challenged me to prioritize that the idea of saying “yes” to everything stung me a at the slightest bit, yet I tried so hard to push the feeling away. And that’s why the “7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens” was helpful, because it was a reminder. A little tap on the shoulder to make me turn around and realize that I was doing activities almost mindlessly. But everyone knows that to make a change, just “knowing what is right”, is never enough. With a little of self reflection and guidance from chapter three of the book, I’ve discovered that there are two sides to prioritizing: identifying and executing. When you identify, you basically look at all the activities that consume time in your life, and evaluate which are worth it and which are not. If you don’t have that part dominated yet, I suggest you read the “Habits of Highly Effective Teens”, it outlines that part extremely well in it’s third chapter. But the part that it doesn’t explain at all, and sadly the one I’m stuck in, is the executing part. Because even though I know what needs to be prioritized, in a way I don’t want to let go of some activities that I’ve held on for so long, which is also part of the reason that I got mad every time a teacher brought the subject up. But, why? It has taken me a long time to admit it, but it was because they were in my comfort zone, because they brought some kind of merit that I loved having. A couple of months ago, I was offered to be the coordinator of a social enterprise, and my mind was already full with a billion of other things, but said “yes” because I believed that it was going to be a great experience, but also because it would look like a great experience in paper. I was more focused on the title of the position that the personal growth it would bring me. And just like this kind of example, there are so many times in which I have been blinded by the merit of something that I don’t stop to ask myself if this is really worth my time. Or even worse, sometimes I do know that I have to prioritize and let some things go, yet I’m so afraid that merit will be taken away, that I always postpone it. Of course, always forgetting that the merit doesn’t come from the activity but from within. So I challenge, anyone that is reading my blog post, to think. Think and really try to analyze your life and see if you feel that your priorities are straight. But most importantly, if they aren’t, then I beg you do admit it to yourself and let it sink in, because that’s the only incentive you will have to change and let them go. It’s cliche but true. The longer you wait to make the change the more it will cost you. And just like JR Tolkien says: "All we have to do now is to decide what to do with the time that is given to us".
1 Comment
Bon
1/19/2016 02:21:59 am
Hey Vale,
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